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Category: Body Language

On the Spectrum of Acceptance and Improvement

On the Spectrum of Acceptance and Improvement

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Discovering as an adult that i am autistic has meant re-framing the cornucopia of my life-long struggles. For example, i have shitty fine-motor skills; i suck at balancing; i sometimes look away in conversation; i bite my cheeks; i have sweaty extremities; i am pained by bright lighting; i repeat things spontaneously. Or, i’m weird; i’m awkward; i’m different; i’m flawed; i’m gifted; i’m wrong; i’m special. The best thing about this discovery? I’ve finally identified a single “cause” for…

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The Accountant: Autism and Pencak Silat in Contemporary Media

The Accountant: Autism and Pencak Silat in Contemporary Media

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Content Warning: trauma, bullying, violence, death, micro-aggressions, spoilers I think i’ll take this week to switch things up with a film analysis. While i’ve previously discussed autism in contemporary media twice — the film Mary and Max, here, and the U.S. TV series The Office, here — i’ve not done so in a while, nor at such length. Today i want to explore The Accountant‘s portrayals of autism, disability, and pencak silat (abbr., silat) I saw it in theaters with…

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The Joys of Pinball Brain: Autism And Death Metal

The Joys of Pinball Brain: Autism And Death Metal

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Pinball brain (n.) is a term roughly defined by my friend as “the state and feeling of [one’s] brain being lit up like a pinball machine“. The connotative meaning of this term is (generally) positive, being associated with feelings of cognitive stimulation, joyousness, pleasure, and life. This term enlightened me as to why i have such a particular love for death metal. And why i sometimes abhor my tendency to perseverate. To illustrate the latter, my linear sequencing tendency makes…

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A Brief Pause for Raisons D’être

A Brief Pause for Raisons D’être

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My pragmatic language is not a problem for me. It becomes a problem when society values attention over (and as an assumption of) intent. In addition to my ability to make consistent eye-contact (despite finding it uncomfortable in certain contexts), i have an impeccable ability to interpret others’ levels of comfortability and attention based on their body language. For example, i was greeting dogs properly since i was a child; their fear of direct eye-contact/approach and comfortability with indirect eye-contact…

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A Movie Changed My Life

A Movie Changed My Life

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Content Warning: trauma, suicide, death, drug use, abandonment, spoilers I have a vivid memory of the first time i watched the 2009 Australian claymation film Mary and Max. I had recently turned 18, and one of my great friends had died suddenly earlier that year from health complications they were unaware of. Mary and Max played on a relatively old CRT-TV in the basement of the house of a friend (whom i didn’t care too much for). I sat watching…

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The Case For and Against The Office (U.S.)

The Case For and Against The Office (U.S.)

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The internet is rife with blog- and forum-posts on the pathologization of characters in the U.S. TV series The Office, specifically regarding autism spectrum dis-order (ASD). From Michael to Angela to (the most common) Dwight, ASD stereotypes have been applied to the behaviors of these beloved characters (by autists and allists alike) to argue for or against their likeness to autists. Indeed, every character on the show has been pathologized by internet users in one way or another. One reason…

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ABA: Good Intentions Are Not Good Enough

ABA: Good Intentions Are Not Good Enough

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Content Warning: trauma, forced compliance, gaslighting When i graduated from university with my b.a. in psychology and human sexuality, i had been in school for 19 consecutive years. By that point, and in spite of my valiant effort to avoid burn-out (by taking my higher education slowly), my candle was burnt at both ends from the oppressive “color-within-the-lines” antiquities of the draconian U.S. public school system. (Clearly bitter; i attribute much of my suffering throughout my education to the [dangerous]…

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